Neighborhood Watch: Five O’clock Shadows



A Neighborhood Watch has been issued to all citizens in the Ghoul Quarter this morning after multiple reports were made of dark, looming figures that were spotted around dusk last evening. Apparently these stormy customers were seen in multiple locations across the Sprawl and no one is sure what their purpose is at this point. In his report, Grapefruit Henry said that he briefly saw two of them standing on his street corner, but when he looked back from mowing his lawn they were gone. “I have seen similar giant-like characters before, but never like this. I thought that I was done for.”

We sent some of our Onlookers out to see if these strangers had left any trace at the street corner as Henry had described, but instead they noticed that his seaweed lawn had not been trimmed in what seemed like months. The algae had spread up the side of his condo and some had even reached his weathervane which had become an iconic fixture of the neighborhood last year when it was struck by lightning. “The vane was giving off its usual orange glow, but the out of control algae was taking over everything,” reported Jimmy Fungus, head Onlooker. “It would be out of the ordinary for Henry to lie to us. He is a first class citizen and always pays his slime tax on time.”

Upon further investigation, we have found that all of the reports we received from across the Quarter have had false elements in them. Jermaine, owner of the Broccoli Emporium, had falsified his description of the lava lamp behind which he had hidden from the foul entities that had appeared in his bodega. Silvia Quagmire mentioned her daughter Jaundice in her description of the individuals, but we all know that Jaundice has been the understudy to the Leashes-Only District’s Plague Warden since 2013. Even the local news anchor, Gwin, mentioned that they were delivering the 6:45 news when they had seen the lurking individuals, but all other eye-witnesses concur that the last sighting was at 5pm on the mark.

These false reports are usual in this line of work, but one constant stayed throughout all of the claims: the night beasts. So, what is their purpose? Where do they come from? And why do they only appear around dusk on weeknights? We here at the watch are staying vigilant and encourage those of our readers in the Ghoul Quarter to do the same. If you are not one of our readers, please report yourself to the authorities immediately since subscription is mandatory for all citizens.

The latest report we have received is from the old woman that lives in the Silk Grotto on 74th street, who claims that something similar to this happened when she was a young actress looking to make a name for herself. “I had just accepted a lead role in the Sound of Music when they started appearing around town,” she claims, taking a monster hit from her vape pen. “We used to call them the Sin Guardians. You knew that a war was coming when these beasts started coming around.”

Whether these were just the ramblings of a delusional mind or actual facts, we may never know. However, it is not our job to know, but to watch.


This article was written by Nathan Ellwood. Follow him for more ghoul ramblings on Twitter @NPEllwood

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