Innovative New Mobile App Bullies You Until You Finish Your Tasks


Has this ever happened to you? It’s the morning before a big project and you have a lot of things on your to-do list. In your head, you already have an entire task list made and at the beginning of the day, you are totally psyched about accomplishing things. But then 3pm rolls around and you hit a wall of apathy that’s almost impossible to get through. You fall into meme holes and spend way too long helping write the articles of impeachment on the shared Google Doc, completely disregarding your actual responsibilities. Well, then we have the perfect solution for you. Introducing the innovative new mobile app, Rodney.


Rodney is what is referred to by the company’s website as a ‘task bully.’ Essentially, rather than just sending you notifications when you have tasks due, Rodney will relentlessly bully and belittle you until your goals are completed. It goes onto explain that by using their patented technology, they are able to know exactly what bugs you through extremely detailed data mining. From there, the rest is pretty simple.


“I mean, I was always my most productive when my wife Margot was on my back about things, so I figured it might help others too,” explained CEO Leslie Stenson. “Turns out, people really resonate with that. We’ve had thousands of downloads and we only launched a few weeks ago.”


When asked why they went with the name Rodney, Head of Product Glen Hapshire told us it came from a deeply personal place. “I had a bully when I was younger and his name was Rodney. I didn’t want to dig something like that up from my past, but when I started thinking about Rodney bullying me around to finish my tasks, I did them faster than I ever had before. I realized that people are more afraid of their own insecurities than they are of their responsibilities.”


From what we gathered, this strategy has been working beautifully and new users are downloading the app every day. We asked about their long term strategy and how they intend to make money from this app, since as it currently stands the app is absolutely free. “Well clearly we have a product that works, so our main focus is on that right now. We need to make the product as good as it can be,” Leslie explained. “And then when we hit that user count threshold, boy oh boy are we going to make so much money on advertisements. Can you imagine what this kind of info is worth to advertisers? It’s like gold.”


Classic Zuckerberg move. That said, we wish them all the best and personally, we prefer Manger, the app that whispers sweet nothings in your ear until you decide to leave society and live on a farm. More our speed.


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