A Billionaire’s Guide to Distraction

Question: Do you know who the man in the photo above is? If you do, you are more worldly than most. For those who don’t, this is Warren Buffett, the 9th richest person on the planet. And unlike his other top tenners like Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos, Buffett does an incredible job of staying out of the spotlight. But, what if I told you that each of these men, in fact all billionaires, are all playing the same game. The game of distraction. Today, we are going to take a closer look at how billionaires distract us in a variety of ways to keep us in line. Consider this a full guide.


First question you might be asking – distract us from what? The fact that they shouldn’t exist and should have their wealth forcibly removed from them, of course.


The initial step in this guide is to find your niche. For example, Elon is killing it with the nerd/try-hard crowd, establishing a firm base for distraction. In fact, he doesn’t even have to do most of it. He can just tweet some weird shit and we forget that he stole his money from Black South Africans for at least a few weeks, all because people are fighting with people attacking him on Twitter for him.


The next step is to beef up your security so that the only way people can threaten you is online or in a courtroom. And as we all know, if you’re rich, neither of those are really that serious. Look at Jeff Bezos. He had private conversations leaked between him and a woman that wasn’t his wife where he said, quote, “I love you alive girl,” and there weren’t mass protests in the streets? We have failed as a country.


Another step in this system of illusion is to have a cause you are ‘passionate about,’ something serious enough to warrant nonprofit status, but not enough for people to look too closely at when it comes to taxes and accounting. Talk about clean money, who would be mad about giving money to charity? Assholes. Yet another way they make us look at each other and not at themselves.


So this is all we ask – billionaires, you keep following this guide. Just do your thing. On our end, we will be watching you and your every move, making sure that nothing slips through the cracks. Whether you can outwit us or not doesn’t matter, we’re coming for you and there are a lot more of us than you.

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