Hey there, welcome to my blog! Let me introduce myself, My name is Bridget Jones Diary and I am an art student. I spend my time painting at my liberal arts college and so far I have existed in this world without much trauma or suffering. I see this as something that sets me apart from my peers, my ability to see things from a different perspective. I owe this to something that I am using my blogging platform to endorse today. I am not like other girls, I have twelve brothers, and it is what made me who I am. Insufferable.

I guess I should be thanking/blaming my parents for having so many damn kids. I mean, what’s that all about? By the time I was born, I was already younger than six of my nieces and nephews. That was weird. It meant I basically had six parents and they were all super distant, which was super confusing. I mainly hung out with the younger two or three brothers that were close enough in age with me to understand the jokes I made and memes I referenced. Just me, Jerome, Terrance, and Hansen.

When I was in middle school, just starting to understand what the hell was going on, I was lucky enough to have plenty of people to talk to about it. Devin told me that he was bullied, but apparently it was J.D. who was bullying him. Clarence was class president, but he told me later that he did that on a date. Grover was no help at all, as he had middle school scrubbed from his memory last month. All in all, I learned a lot of random facts about my family, facts I would spread among my friends in order to survive middle school unscathed.

High school was kind of my prime, which I realize now is pretty sad. I was the artsy girl before everyone was an artsy girl, you know? Before Instagram? It was cool, but then I felt pigeon-holed into that role which is why I am studying art now, but I think I’ve lost my passion. I don’t know who I am out here in the big world without my team of brothers and their spouses and kids, some of whom I went to school with my entire life. What would I do without them?

Who am I? I’m not a normal girl, I’m a girl with twelve brothers, and I am very confused in general.

This article was written by Noot Smoot, yep, that’s right. Follow him on Twitter @NPEllwood.