‘Game of Thrones’ Fans Who Named Their Child ‘Joffrey’ Starting to Have Second Thoughts

gameofthronesparents

(Charlotte, NC) Although it has been just over a month since the series finale of Game of Thrones, fans around the world are still mourning the loss of their favorite TV show, often in chaotic and bizarre ways. Some fans have begun to host watching parties where groups of friends binge the series together over the course of a couple weeks, with others trying anything to mix it up including watching the series backwards or on shuffle. All that said, there’s nothing these fans are doing that is as big of a commitment as what some hardcore fans have reported doing. Today, we sat down with a group of fans that have named their children after characters from the show, including but not limited to Khaleesi, Arya, Stannis, and, most surprisingly, Joffrey.

 

Here are their stories.

 

Beth and Susan – Named their child Khaleesi. We want Khal to grow up to become the queen of the universe, so we named her after who we thought was an unimpeachable character. Well, spoiler alert, we were right! Did you see the way she destroyed that city? Badass feminism right there my friends. We can’t wait until our little Khal proverbially roasts an entire population alive, whatever that might look like.

 

Gladys and Jonathan – Named their child Joffrey. Listen, this one is on us. We are very easily excitable and it gets us in trouble. When Gladys was pregnant with Joff, we got really, really bored while waiting for him to be born so we decided to finally watch this Game of Thrones show everyone has been talking about. Well, 2 episodes in, we have to rush to the hospital for an early delivery and the name Joffrey was just stuck in my head. I still don’t know what happens, but judging from the looks we have got, probably not great.

 

Pat and Glo – Named their child Arya. Because she is the best. Next question.

 

Harry and Loggins – Named their child Samwell. Realizing now we could have just named him Sam or Samuel or even Samantha, but we went with Samwell, something now associated with John Bradley. No offense John, but not my ideal situation. Why did we do this again?

 

Neil and Harriet – Named their child Stannis. We’re pretty straightforward people, so we were always were team Stannis, you know? So when our little boy was born looking like a Gary, we put our thinking caps on and went into the future, trying to predict the next Gary. The type of guy who is reliable, but unknowable. Standard, but manual. On top of his business, but wildly unpredictable. That, and more, is what we have dreams of for Stannis.

 

Bart and Claudius – Named their child Joffrey, also. Dude, I am so tired I don’t even want to talk about, but if you must know, Joffrey is family name. I just hate that the series had to ruin that name for our son before he can even walk. That’s not fair. That’s not American. But in the end, it’s a fictional character, what’s the worst that could happen?

 

At least we can all thank God that no-one has named their kid Drogon yet, but it’s probably only a matter of time.

 

 

 

 

 

This was written by Nathan Ellwood, who can’t wait to name his firstborn Shaggydog. Follow him @NPEllwood.

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