Remember that time you were walking down your stairs late at night and you glanced up at your phone to see something staring back at your from the ceiling? Or that time you were looking in the mirror and saw an old friend from high school standing right beside you? Not jogging your memory? Well what about the time where you were taking a shower and all the lights went off, and even though you could barely see through the fog without your glasses, you saw a thousand spiders pour out of the wall? Funny enough, those were all ghosts that live in your home. Here are 4 ways to see if they are chill or not.
1. Talk to them like you would your plants. You know how you are supposed to breath on your plants to get them to grow? Like because of oxygen or whatever? Well ghosts operate in a very similar fashion. They like when you talk to them because obviously you can’t see them, so speaking is one of the few ways you will be able to communicate. One thing, you’ll have to always be recording on your phone and then play the tape backward to hear what they say back. If they like the plants, they are chill.
2. Bring a cat into the house. Since cats can see ghosts, you are going to want to have one around who can track the various ghosts in your house. Plus, cats are good companions for when things get spooky. If your ghost is chill, they will play with the cat when you are away and keep them company. If the ghost is evil, the cat will be the least of your worries.
3. Throw up some dope art prints. Ghosts want to love where they live. Who doesn’t? So why not bust out the ouija board and see what kind of dope art prints they want for the walls? Personally, my ghosts love the one with the bear in the woods, they tell me it is a calming presence when they don’t have me to watch. I don’t really care about decor, so might as well let them pick, right? I get compliments all the time. That’s how you know they are chill. Evil ghosts will just rip up everything you love.
4. Buy a really old camera. There is no better way to figure out what kind of ghost you have than to just take their picture. Although most ghosts simply show up as a glowing orb in photos, chill ghosts will appear wearing really long shorts and sipping a Modelo. We recommend trying this last, as taking a picture of an evil ghost can be deadly and we want to avoid that. The older the camera the better.
And that completes our list. Sorry if we got a little bit distracted, but the Earth is literally on fire. Plus, my house ghosts are super chill.
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