Has this ever happened to you? It’s the early morning and you just awoke from a fitful night of sleep. You walk out of your room and into the kitchen, but not before something in the hall wafts into your nose, causing you to do a double take and examine the source of the smell further. After some quick exploratory sniffs, you follow the scent to the hall rug and locate a small pool of freshly deposited urine. Since you haven’t had your coffee yet, you reach for the nearest air freshener and begin to fill the room with the aerosol spray. You take another sniff to see if it helped and remark, “Huh.”

You are now standing in your hall over the scene of the crime, your nostrils filled with the interesting smell of both Lavender Breeze and cat piss. “At least it’s not just the smell of cat piss,” you think. “But this somehow seems worse than just cat piss.”

Knowing you will soon spiral if you try to approach this problem on an empty stomach, you make your way back to the kitchen to mull over the issue and replenish your mind and body with the fuel it needs to tackle the horrendous situation developing in the hall.

Just as you are pouring your second cup of coffee, The Culprit enters the room with a barely audible ‘mrow.’ You stare at this wild beast in front of you and just as you are about to launch into a tirade about how spoiled he is and ask ‘why can’t you just piss in your litter box like a normal cat?’ he rubs his body against your leg. You try to maintain your anger, but it becomes more difficult the more he rubs up against you.

Suddenly, a sound from down the hall as you realize your roommate is waking up and will soon encounter the hall where a bizarre mix of scents is only becoming more pungent. “Wait, don’t!” you try to yell down the hallway, but you are too late.

“What in God’s name is that smell?” you hear your roommate ask from down the hall, covering their nose with their sleep shirt, just trying to make it to the shared bathroom.

“Lavender Breeze,” you reply. “And cat piss.”

Your roommate takes another sniff and yes, “Yeah you nailed it. I’ll get the enzymatic cleaner.”

Before either of you realize the folly of this, your roommate sprays the cat piss with the cleaner and an explosion of smells begins emanating from the rug. As you try to escape the hall and the source, you start to see visions from the fumes in the air. Eventually, you both pass out under the oppressive smell.

Your unconscious bodies are found the next day with bite marks from where the cat tried to eat your warm flesh while you were in a coma. Upon waking up in the hospital and hearing this story, you simply shrug and say “That’s being a Cat Mom.”