Upon the desert landscape, I made my home. Hi, my name is Magenta Clove and I am what is known as a mirage. Today, I am going to tell you a little bit about my life. My hope is that once you hear my story you will have a better appreciation for my professional and my people. Long have we walked the harrowing isolation of the deserts, hoping that a lone traveler will be captivated by our calm demeanor and flowing clothing. It is every mirage’s dream to be gazed upon, for this is how we are fulfilled. I recently was seen for the first time by human eyes. This, is my story.

First, a quick history on my people. Since the dawn of time, their have been what is known as “The Calm Ones.” These are individuals, seen as called upon by the Earth herself, to roam her farthest reaches in awe of the vastness, the sheer size of our planet. Those seen as called upon by the Calm Ones are sent off the moment this is discovered and are not to be seen, other than by distant human eyes, ever again.

Think back through your history classes and remember that there have been mirages for thousands of years. We have been just in the distance this whole time, not close enough to be seen, but there for when the time would come to attack. But I’m rambling, don’t worry about what I just said. Moving on.

I was discovered myself to be a Calm One when I was only 8 years old. I was sent from the only world I had ever known into a long, desolate sandy plain. The dunes and wastes have done their toll on me. I have been weak for so long. It took me 27 long years of silently walking the Earth before this hiker that got bit by a snake saw me walking away from him just as the venom did it’s damage. He swears to his friends that what he saw was real, and the more they disbelieve him, the stronger I become.

Now that I know the way these fools operate, I plan to expand my operation to a famed desert city, perhaps Dubai, where I will rack up maximum sightings. All I have to do is disappear at the moment they are just about to stop believing. That really gets them. I will soak up this power until I am the strongest being in the universe. Then, I will walk away from it all.

The people of Earth, even those I once called family, will watch me disappear into the distance and just as they are about to stop believing in me, I will be gone. I will never return and my name will live on in legend. The longer my legend is around, the stronger I will become as more come to doubt my name.

It’s a pretty good plan. See you around, nerds.

This article was written by Nathan Ellwood, who? This guy! Follow him for more on Twitter @NPEllwood.