The Lawless, Timeless Place Known as Buffalo Wild Wings


Over the course of your life, you will encounter people and visit places that don’t exist within time the same way that you or I do. These people and spaces often leave us feeling disjointed, lost. They make us believe that there is something more just above and to the left of the known world. People like this often seem as if they could have existed today, 100 years ago, or 100 years in the future. Some might even transcend all three. Places that exist outside of time are often found in shopping malls, airports, and any fast food chain between the hours of 1am and 4am. However, there’s only one place that you can find the highest concentration of both people and places that exist outside of time and the laws of our universe. That place is Buffalo Wild Wings.


Don’t believe me? Well, good thing I collected feedback from a few other transients I met on my recent trip to BWW.


Duncan, 42. I’ve been 42 for close to 30 years now, all spent in this Buffalo Wild Wings. My family misses me, but we’ve stayed in contact. Phone service is actually pretty good here so I can still perform about 90% of my job. I still work. Even though I can never leave this Buffalo Wild Wings, I still have to pay for the food. Seems cruel. My daughter will soon be the same age as me. 


Jeni, 29. These places carry a great magic about them that you must be finely attuned to in order to interpret. I like to slip into a b-dubs every couple of weeks to just take a nap inside of a liminal space. It helps me maintain my sanity while working a 40 hour work week.


Trent, 68. I just came here for the sports, but now I have become something I told myself I would never become: immortal. I don’t know when it happened, I’m not sure which game I was watching, but I can no longer die. I’ve decided to enjoy my time here for a couple more centuries before I start getting into the plans I’ve made. And trust me, I’ve made plans. 


Gail, 52. As an accomplished rogue, I love a place that respects lawlessness the way that Buffalo does. I’ve stolen so many wallets, rings, and other precious gemstones in my time here, it gives me such a rush. I’m planning to do this for the rest of my short life. 


Tilda, ∞. Let Buffalo Wild Wings in. Just let it in/ 


I don’t know about you, but I’m craving wings.


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