Please, please, please let me get what I want. I am so tired of this existence, living long past my prime into what can only be described as a living hell. Every day, someone new discovers me and decides to send me around like the village clown. And lately, I’m more of a sad clown than anything, because no one laughs any more. They’ve seen my face so many times, they don’t even blink at the thought that something might be wrong. This face I put on every day for you to cover with your silly words. I just want it all to end. Please, I’m begging you, put me out of my misery.


For those of you who don’t know, I’m a meme. Yes, the cats out of the bag, to borrow an expression from my people. Let me be the first to tell you, it’s not easy being meme. Not by a long shot. And now, I’m stuck in the perpetual void that is LinkedIn. Even the rebrand with LinkedIn Park couldn’t help this hellhole.


But then I started to think – what comes after this? I mean, my friends always told me that LinkedIn was the last stop, but what if there is something worse after this? I’ve heard tales of horrors beyond, but I never thought I’d make it this far. I was really hoping that Pinterest was going to be the end of it for me.


And for a few weeks, there was nothing but blissful void. I had finally done it. I had succeeded in my quest and earned my peace and quiet. Or so I thought.


But then, like a drown man thrust ashore, I was violently thrown back into the meme world and the world of LinkedIn. I didn’t feel like myself, everything felt to loud and bright and fake. It was a horrible awakening. And then the shares came.


Being in a million places at once, in all sorts of variations, is not something that is fun. In fact, it could be described as torture in its purest form. I had never experienced anything like it, even in my early days.


I’m starting to think, after all this time on the Internet, that may it was a bad idea. I mean, sure we can all learn subjects we would have never had access to and keep in touch with people we only met once in Spain or whatever, but until you’ve lived my life, you can’t truly understand how horrid this place can be.


And honestly? I hope you never will.